Research has shown us that relationships are at the heart of learning. Yet, human relationships are infinitely complex. How then might teachers become experts in managing the relationships that are critical for student learning and effective school leadership?
In my own practice, there have been two keys; restorative justice and open to learning conversations. Each of these practices is evidence-based with a solid body of research to show that it makes an impact when implemented with fidelity. These two strategies has a few things in common that I believe make them particularly powerful:
- Preserving mana - In resolving any conflict or problem, it is important that each person can walk away feeling that they were respected, even if they were in the wrong.
- Co-design the solution - Solutions designed by one person tend to only work for one person. It is only when we combine the collective problem-solving of all stakeholders that we can create a solution that meets everyone's needs. This becomes even more important in situations where there is a high degree of complexity and where one human can never understand all the variables.
- Learning is at the heart - When we allow people the opportunity to learn from their mistakes by exploring the impact in a respectful, meaningful way, it allows them the opportunity to step up and do better. What's more, it can give people access to the perspectives of others in a way that they might not otherwise consider, hence, we can build empathy and compassion for our peers.
- Don't make assumptions - In each of these practices, we try to move away from making assumptions, about people, about events, about why or how things happened. Instead, we enter these conversations with curiosity.
Image source: Medium
There is no question that education is influenced by an endless number of variables, and as a result, so are the relationships in schools. The relationships that we navigate within a school are often influenced by these variables. That conflict with a student about why they did not turn in their work might be a result of personal and family values, systemic bias, lack of resources, or disengagement as a result of disempowerment. What makes open-to-learning and restorative conversations so valuable for managing relationships is that they allow us to learn about the variables, and as a result, respond more effectively because that learning allows us to understand the cause of the problem, not just the symptoms.
I distinctly remember conversations during my teacher training about how schools have a tendency to dismiss the 'theory' of teacher training colleges for the practicalities of actually being in the classroom. In other words, all that academic theory is nice, but when you are standing in front of a room of chatty year ten students, it doesn't seem all that relevant. Similarly, when you attend a PLD workshop from a facilitator who hasn't been in the classroom for years and years, it can be hard to take their suggestions seriously. However, in my now ten-plus years of experience, I have found that this couldn't be further from the truth. It is learning to apply robust educational research that has allowed me to become a more effective teacher. So what does applying this educational research look like on a day-to-day level for a practicing teacher?
Restorative practice
Like everything, to get better at something you have to practice it. In the case of restorative practice, this has meant years and years of learning about it through PLD workshops, my own reading, etc. I practised restorative conversations on a daily basis. I would read over the restorative script before having a conversation with students. I would have the script in front of me as facilitated conversations. Eventually, the restorative script became second nature to me, and as a result, this powerful practice that allows students the space to make mistakes, learn from them, repair harm, and move on, is now part of my core practice. It means that I can have better relationships with students. In a restorative practice setting it means my expectations of learning and behaviour can be clear, but these are not communicated and enforced at the expense of the relationship. After all, we know that people, adults and students, don't learn particularly well when they do not feel psychologically safe enough to make mistakes.
Open-to-Learning conversations
When working with people, conflict and disagreement is inevitable. Open-to-Learning Conversations give us a way to navigate these difficult conversations, particularly with colleagues.
"An open-to-learning conversation, therefore, is one in which this value is evident in how people think and talk. Do they assume the validity of their views and try to impose them, however nicely, on others, or are they searching for ways to check and improve the quality of their thinking and decision-making?" - Viviane M J Robinson
- Describe your concern as your point of view. - I notice that you are not on track with your goal to get a Merit endorsement.
- Describe what your concern is based on. - This concerns me because I know you are working towards a limited entry pathway at university for the forensics programme you are interested in.
- Invite the other’s point of view. - How do you explain this?
- Paraphrase their point of view and check. - It sounds like you are really busy right now but that you feel like you can manage all your commitments?
- Detect and check important assumptions - What would be a sign that you are over-committed? How will you know when you are no longer successfully juggling your commitments?
- Establish common ground. - It sounds like we agree that you need to carve out some time to catch up on your work?
- Make a plan to get what you both want. - What do you think we should do about this?
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